Friday, April 13, 2007

Uncle Sam Provides Not

Yesterday, I went up to my Alma mater on the banks of the old Raritan where the Imus fiasco continues to dominate conversation. All my cool collegiate friends were so excited to hear about my new career and what its like to fly all day. I must admit, I love the attention of an audience that wants to hear all about me. My friend AJ wanted to know how much I make, so please follow along with the math:

Alyssa is a brand new flight attendant for a legacy airline; she began flying in March. With her union contract, she is guaranteed to fly 83 hours in a month, at $18 an hour. How much will she make in one month? How much will she make this year? And is she eligible for food stamps?

one month: $1,494
2007: $14,940
food stamps: NO

I repeat, I am not eligible for food stamps. Now that I've just laid out exactly how much I make, I will be accepting donations to the "Feed The Lysser Fund." All jokes aside, in the Garden State, our minimum wage at the moment is approx. $7.50, and even those (literally) poor people make too much to qualify. Minimum wage workers make too much to qualify for food stamps. Then who's getting them? What's the point in having a safety net that's set just low enough so more people than not hit the ground? The most twisted part of this whole thing, is that I was actually looking forward to having them...

1 comment:

Unknown said...

i live about 2 blocks from cbs radio hq... there have been news vans literally parked out front for the past week.
in other news, i was hired yesterday. i don't qualify for food stamps either.